Friday, February 5

Thinking out loud

Yesterday, while walking home, I couldn't stop myself but think about the situation we live in here in Azerbaijan. I started asking questions, questions that many probably ask themselves every day.

Why don't we have a democracy?
Why don't we have freedom of speech and media?
Why don't we have tolerance and respect?
Why are we so desperate?
Why can't we have free and fair elections?
Why can't the ruling party give a chance and not be afraid of anything that might come out of freedom?
Why do we live in constant fear? Why do I have to live in constant fear that I might get arrested, or that my family might get into trouble for being my family?
Why can't we simply be?
Why, why, why...

I was thinking out loud, at some point I caught myself mumbling these things as I walked. A rush of adrenalin took over, as if I was in a public debate. Then, I got quiet, and for a second imagined that all those things I thought of didn't really exist, that everything was simply normal. I didn't want to let go of that thought, but it was time to wake up, it was time to get back to reality...

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Arzu,

I feel for you. I lived in that damn nation long enough to mumble similar stuff.

As far as I know from my experience, those questions will not take you anywhere. If anything, they will add on your pain.


Peasant from Baku

Anonymous said...

because freedom comes with a price, because nobody said building democracy was going to be easy, because free and fair elections mean fighting for it everyday, because nobody gives you power, you take it.

p.s. I hear you.

Nessuna

Anonymous said...

Arzu, have you ever read the consitution of Azerbaijan Republic? I doubt that 50% of population have ever read it. I dont know what they were thinking when they voted for it. According to the same constitution, government has the right to use forces under certain circumstances....and etc...that's where everything starts from CONSTITUION!!!

Regards,

M.A.

arzu geybulla said...

@M.A aka anonymous: i have read our constitution and to me everything starts from education and those who are giving that education.
but of course constitution is also very important, i agree with you on that too.
thanks for the comment.

Anonymous said...

@Arzu, I totally agree about EDUCATION; however, education alone does not stand a chance, we both were lucky to study abroad starting from FSA ending up doing master somewhere in europe..again WE GOT LUCKY wand we are only small percentage of total youth.Along with education it comes what you see around, who you meet, not only what you study-which is theoretical crap only.The bottom line is, education should not start from schools and universities only, but from TV, Museums,Theatres, less of this stupid "show business" and Turkish soap operas. Sometimes, I do regret about studying abroad and getting "good" education, but actually open up my eyes and to see what's going on with the country...., what for? Wouldnt it be better hm, how to say....to be blind not to see around...

Peace,

M.A.

arzu geybulla said...

@anonymous: well put. I agree with you totally. Its not only education at schools but also social education thats outside of school and university premises. the crap thats on tv is another issue- there is simply nothing to watch apart from showbiz news and soap operas and thats why people watch them. perhaps having more education and culture oriented programs on TV could be a step forward but in all of this lies one very important factor- its the strategy the government plays by- because something different will make people realize that there are other things in their life that could be more important, like education, like going to theaters, reading books, and etc.

and yes, we are the lucky ones, but who says that others can't achieve the same. there are high students who despite their crap education still manage to get into universities but of course there are not many of them. and that is what soo worrisome.

Anonymous said...

Yes, it is a strategy, as was Santa Barbara in early 1990's to keep people busy, to give hope to hopeless....BUT that's what people WANT TO HEAR WANT TO SEE....that's why I say that no matter how much system and government is critized nothing will change as long as people do not want it, and by people i do not mean only US.you me then 10000 others....but PEOPLE

arzu geybulla said...

@anonymous: they don't want to or they simply lack any incentives. to be honest though, i think criticizing wont change anything, you are right. perhaps there are other ways of bringing any kind of change?! don't know. and also as long as we current government structure, oil and gas, and corruption and all the rest that fits into this threesome things will remain the same if not get even worse.
(sigh) don't know really... is it really that hopeless? can't we do anything about it?

Anonymous said...

1st, eventually the system would change, even if it doesnt want...maybe after 50-70 years, but we wont see it. However, still there is hope for better future..for future generations

2nd. Hopeless people are dead people.