There was a number of high as well as low moments this past year for me. Be it professional or personal life- there were many moments when I felt it was a "that's it" moment.
There were moments when i was the happiest person on earth. There were times when i hit the bottom. I was heart broken, mended back into a whole again, angry (so much that I was ready to break someone's nose, jaw- it didn't matter, all I wanted to do was to beat the crap out of someone), upset and happy again.
I guess this year was full of emotions for me- good and bad. And so i hope 2010 for me is only full of happy moments and emotions as i believe i had my fair share of all the badness, evilness. And hopefully there will be only those people who will only be there for me rather than be pretentious, insecure, full of themselves, self- centered individuals.
This year I also learned how it must feel to hate someone. At different times and for different reasons I learned how easy it is for people blame others and yet feel absolutely sure that they were/are doing the right thing.
I saw that even closest people to you might be liars and all in all very shallow people.
I learned how hard it is to accept ones own mistakes but also the feeling of greatest satisfaction once you do.
For yet another time, I learned to move on and look for better things as well as people in my life. At times I managed and succeeded, at times I failed but all in all it all passed.
I learned the price for opening up my deepest and most secret feelings- not everyone will understand and share the pain, the sorrow and all the rest hidden in that closet called your heart.
I learned how hard it is to mend a broken heart and tortured soul.
I lost some people who were (or so I thought) close and valuable. But in return I have made some great friendships and opened for myself many new horizons.
2009 was a full year for me. My friends were thrown into jail, which made me think that it could have been me or someone else as well. They will be celebrating new year in thir cells but I want to wish them much strength and patience! And most importantly I wish them many more happy, healthy years spent not behind bars but with their family and friends.
And so, though i wish many things didnt happen this year to me, i am glad they did. Because for all it's worth, it only made me stronger! Nietzsche said it right: "what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger" (or "that which doesn't kill us, makes us stronger").